How do I calculate my expenses?  They vary monthly.
You can approach the calculation a couple of ways.  You can take the average based on expenses for the last three months.  Or you can take the average over the last year.  Just be sure to be consistent.  If you take averages of the last three months for income, you should do the same for expenses.  You may want to talk to an attorney because it might be helpful to calculate figures one way or another based on your request for alimony and child support.

Nothing has changed on my financial statement since the last hearing.  Do I need to completely redo the financial statement for the upcoming hearing?
No, most courts will accept the prior financial statement if you re-sign the final page on the date of the upcoming hearing.  Be careful though—chances are a figure did change, such as your checking account balance or the balance of your 401k.

I want to explain something on the financial statement that is not clear.  Where do I do that?
You can footnote a field, and then enter footnotes on the bottom of the page.  Alternatively, you can include endnotes in an addendum.  Be sure the footnotes/endnotes are on the copy submitted to the court.

It’s easier for me to complete the financial statement by hand. 
The copy you submit to the court needs to be typed and on pink paper.  It sounds silly, but providing a pink, typed copy will flag to the court that you are a serous litigant who knows what you are doing. 

However, there are several things a divorce mediator cannot do because it would be a conflict of interest.  First, a mediator is not supposed to give either party legal counsel.  For example, the mediator cannot tell Wife that she should file a Motion to Compel because Husband has been non-compliant with temporary child support, nor can the mediator advise Husband to not move in with his new girlfriend because it will impact his rights to receive alimony.  It is a conflict of interest to give this type of guidance to one or both parties, while also mediating. 

Second, a mediator technically should not draft a Separation Agreement for the parties.  Drafting a legal document, such as the Separation Agreement, is part of legal representation.  If the mediator drafts it, who is she drafting it for?  One party?  The other?  She can’t draft it for both of them because that would be a conflict of interest.

You may find divorce mediators who are willing to smudge these lines, but be careful.  The court might not accept a Separation Agreement “mediated” in that manner.  To prevent trouble, hire an attorney in addition to your mediator.  Your attorney can answer your legal questions and draft the Separation Agreement for you.  That way, you don’t have to implicate your mediator in a conflict of interest.  And, as a bonus, the court is more likely to accept a Separation Agreement where both parties had counsel.  It might seem more expensive to hire a mediator and an attorney, but it saves you the cost of a Separation Agreement that breaks down before the court.   

1) What is your name and address?  Are you married?  What is the name of your spouse?  When were you married?  Did there come a time when your marriage suffered a breakdown?  Were there any minor children born to this marriage?  (The judge asks these questions to confirm the accuracy of the information on your complaint for divorce.)

2) Have you had an opportunity to read the Separation Agreement?  Do you believe it is fair and reasonable?

3) Have you had an opportunity to consult counsel?  If so, are you satisfied with your counsel’s ability to answer all of your questions?  If not, do you understand that you may be waiving certain rights under the law, such as the right to alimony and property disposition?  Do you understand that property disposition is final and cannot be modified?

4) Have you had the opportunity to review your spouse’s financial statement?  Do you believe it is truthful and accurate? Did you have the opportunity to request and review supporting documentation?

5) Were you of sound mind when you signed this Separation Agreement?  Were you under force or duress to sign this Separation Agreement?

If the judge reviews your Separation Agreement and financial statements and believes that a provision is unfair or unreasonable, such as a waiver of child support or alimony, the judge may send you and your spouse out in the hallway to modify that provision of the Separation Agreement.  To avoid this hassle, before you sign the Separation Agreement, ask your counsel if the judge is likely to find it fair and reasonable. 

Before a client divorces, the client must think through the financial reality of maintaining two separate households.  In most cases, prior to divorce, the family income maintains one home.  After divorce, the same amount of money must be stretched to meet the needs of two homes.  What would it look like for the client to live on half the amount of money currently entering the home?  Before pursuing divorce, the client should sit down and budget what life would be like.  If the client will be receiving child support and/or alimony, how much child support and/or alimony will the client receive?  Is it enough to cover rent, groceries, and other necessities?  Will the client need to take on extra work to meet all his or her expenses?  If the client will be paying child support and/or alimony, how will that impact the client’s ability to live on his or her own?

The client may want to keep the marital home, but will the client be able to maintain it?  Can the client afford to pay the mortgage, utilities, insurance, and taxes?  If not, will the client be able to find a sufficient rental option in the children’s school district?  If the client is hopeful to purchase a new piece of property, will the client have enough money from the property disposition to make a down payment?  After dividing the parties’ liabilities, will the client have the credit necessary to buy a house?

Similarly, the client should envision what life might look like with a time-sharing arrangement.  How will client feel about only seeing the children on weekdays?  Or on weekends?  Or whatever time-sharing arrangement is likely? How will the client feel about not being able to move the children out of the area without the consent of the opposing party?

Sometimes divorce is worth it, but not always. 

1) All hearings are recorded so the court has a record.  The recording technology only captures audible and clear voices.  Speak with a strong and clear voice so the judge does not need to tell you to speak up.

2) At the start of a hearing, every person appearing before the court must introduce his or her name to the record.  Be prepared to state your name, once again audibly and clearly.  For example, “Good morning, your honor, Joe Smith.”

3) Address the judge as “Your honor.”  For example, “Your honor, we’re here before you on a Complaint for Contempt filed September 1, 2013.”

4) Know your facts, and practice presenting them in a clear way.  If you are worried you will freeze during the hearing, bring a legal pad with a cheat sheet of names and dates of birth for children, addresses for property, and other pertinent data.

5) Keep calm, and never interrupt the opposing party, opposing counsel, or the judge!

1) Will the court consider a second job of the payor?  What if the payor took on the second job in order to meet his/her child support obligation?

Generally, second jobs are considered at the discretion of the court.  The court may consider “none, some, or all overtime income.”  If the payor takes on a second job after the child support is ordered, in order to pay said child support, there is a presumption that the second job should not be considered in a future child support order.

2) Is the income of a non-parent guardian (i.e. grandma, great-aunt) considered for calculation of child support?

It’s not supposed to be.

3) Does child support use the gross or net income?

Gross weekly income.

4) My spouse has 1/3 parenting time or less. How is child support calculated?

Run the guidelines as is, using this form.

5) My spouse and I share parenting time 50/50.  How is child support calculated?

Run the child support guidelines twice—first with one parent as recipient and second with other parent as recipient.  The difference in calculations shall be paid to the parent with the lower weekly support amount. 

6) My spouse has more than 1/3 of parenting time but less than 1/2.  How is child support calculated?

Run the guidelines first with one parent as recipient, and second as if the parties shared 50/50.  (See answer #5.)  The average of these figures shall be the child support amount. 

7) My spouse and I have two minor children.  One lives with me and one lives with my spouse.  How is child support calculated? 

Run the child support guidelines twice—first with one parent as recipient using the number of children in his/her care, and second with other parent as recipient using number of children in his/her care.  The difference in calculations shall be paid to the parent with the lower weekly support amount. 

8) I am responsible for 100% of my children’s college costs.  How does this impact child support?

The child support determination is at the discretion of the court, but the court shall consider the college contribution when setting the order.

9) How does the court consider the payment of extraordinary uninsured medical/dental expenses?

Again, these are considered at the discretion of the court on a case-by-case basis.

10) How long does child support last?

Generally, child support continues until the child reaches age 18.  However, if the child is still in college and primarily domiciled with one parent, it may extend until age 23.

As you can see, while much of child support is formulaic, plenty is determined at the discretion of the court.  For this reason, it can be very helpful to have an attorney!

1) Length of marriage;
2) Conduct of parties during marriage;
3) The age, health, station, occupation, amount and sources of income, vocational skills, employability, estate, liabilities and needs of each of the parties;
4) The opportunity of each party for future acquisition of capital assets and income;
5) The amount and duration of alimony;
6) The present and future needs of the dependent children of the marriage;
7) The contribution of each of the parties in the acquisition, preservation or appreciation in value of their respective estates; and
8) The contribution of each of the parties as a homemaker to the family unit.

In the state of Massachusetts, property division is final.  Unlike alimony or child support, you cannot modify the division of property after the divorce.  Accordingly, it’s crucial that you meet with an attorney to be sure you are obtaining the best possible division of property during your divorce.  You want to be sure you have sufficient assets to survive economically once you are living without joint income.